Elizabeth O'Sullivan

I decided to become a childbirth educator after the birth of my second child. My cousin and his wife, who were thinking of starting a family, came over to meet the baby, and they asked about my experience having a baby without using pain relief.

“It was very empowering!” I said. My cousin looked confused.

“You mean empowering because you know that you can stand so much pain?” he asked.

“No,” I said. “It was empowering because there was this amazing power that flowed through me, and it belonged to me.” He looked surprised, as if nobody had ever described labor that way before.

Most people have heard that birth is scary and painful, but fewer have heard that it can also be extatic. It is harder to have a positive birth experience if one doesn’t believe that such a thing is possible. And it matters whether mothers have a positive birth experience. A mom always remembers the day her baby is born, and positive and negative experiences from that day can affect her and her family for years.

As a childbirth educator, I tell stories of beautiful births because, according to research, moms are more likely to have a positive birth experience if they go into it with positive expectation. (And I also tell the stories because they are beautiful.)

I also encourage moms to make well-informed decisions about their birth and to trust themselves. Although I am very excited about the benefits of natural birth, I don’t want moms to go away thinking that they can have their babies the “right way” if they avoid medical procedures. Every birth is different, and some benefit from medical procedures, including pain medication.

On the other hand, I am very concerned about the over use of medical procedures. For example, the World Health Organization says that when a country’s cesarean rate goes above 15 percent, the health drawbacks of the procedure outweigh the benefits. In the US more than 30 percent of babies are born by cesarean. A large body of research also shows that many medical procedures commonly used during birth are not necessarily beneficial. Families will be well served if they are empowered to be active, well-informed partners in their health care.

Birth is a real adventure, in the best sense of the word.  My wish is that families will not go away for my class worried about having their babies the “right way” or the “wrong way.” My wish is that families be empowered to be present with the awesome power that flows through them during birth, to recognize that power as belonging to them, and to be deeply nourished by the experience.